Australia

Stories

The VORTEX (or, OZ for sale, cheap mate)

To paraphrase Merriam Webster:

a collection of backpackers endowed with a rapid rotary motion around an axis.

The Vortex is the pernicious industry that has grown up, not to cater to backpackers, but to harvest them, slowly, like cutting the bark on a maple tree for the sap to slowly drip into a bucket. It’s not a service so much as it is a processing system, with as much empathy as a meat processing plant.

Sep 12 2004 - 23:00

SWAG

Originally: The pack or bundle containing the belongings of a swagman.A camping ground cover, usually made of canvas. It’s a good alternative to a tent if you like to see the stars. It has a foam rubber mattress on which you put your sleeping bag -- after checking the Swag for anything nasty that can kill you. Once inside you can draw up the two zippers, one on either side, and it encloses you and your sleeping bag. It’s very effective in keeping you extra warm and has a flap to go over your head in really bad conditions.

Jan 17 2008 - 00:00

We are not in Kansas any more, the Rocks, Sydney, Australia

It rained for most of the first day and a half after my arrival so it might have contributed to my first impression that Sydney is a little “London down under” with a slight Southern Californian spin, like, umm, you know? People were friendly enough and very helpful.

It was here that I first noticed a fascinating trait. If you ask an Australian a question that they don’t happen to know the answer, they will happily make something up. Just to be helpful of course, and to get you on your way.

Jul 30 2004 - 23:00

OZ, Over and Out

It was in Cairnes that I actually became “aware” of the [[Vortex]]. Although I had been in it since Alice Springs. Up till now it was only an uneasy feeling in the back of my mind. Here it became real.

I arrived at 06:00, and went straight to the Caravelle 149 backpacker’s hotel, where my room was not ready. I waited till 10:30, got grief because the amount I prepaid was A$5 too little, and then on getting to the room found it was not what I’d paid anyway. With a straight face the guy at the reception explained, “mate”, that this is normal for Backpackers.

Mar 12 2007 - 00:00

Litchfield, Kakado and Around Darwin

To be a guide in any of the national parks you have to undergo proper training. Early the next day we met Nile and he was both a professional and a good guy. Litchfield is full of sacred sites, lots of nice swimming holes with waterfalls like from a Bounty commercial. (Side note: it’s hard to breath behind a waterfall)

Sep 27 2004 - 23:00

Follow the Red Dirt Road: Alice Springs to Darwin

What do you call a tour guide that hasn’t yet qualified to guide in the National Parks?
Answer: A bus driver.

In the Vortex, an “adventure tour” to Darwin is a bus trip with scenic rest stops. Half the group consisted of a family from the UK, traveling in Australia, getting in touch with their roots: the parents, Fiona and Ian; two charming daughters, Carita and Rox; Rox's friend, Max (also charming); and brother -- ‘mad-dog’—David (less charming).

Sep 19 2004 - 23:00

Alice Springs, Aires Rock, Palm Canyon and Glen Helen Gorge, Outback, Austrailia

Oh my, people come and go so quickly

Alice Springs is a community smack in the middle of the outback. It has a main street, Todd Street, with a mall at one end, and well, nothing really at the other end.

Coming into town, on my way to the Malanka Motel, it reminded me of southern California, and I never did shake the feeling that it was a beach town that had misplaced it’s beach.It has that kind of buzz that towns have when the population is principally transient.

Nov 16 2004 - 00:00

Uluru (Ayers rock), Waltzing Matilda and Cross-Dressing Australians

The park surrounding Uluru (Ayers rock) is jointly run by the Aborigines and the Australian government. At the entrance you’re handed a sheet with an extensive list of rules and penalties. Ayres Rock, Australia

May 30 2004 - 23:00